Dr. Cheri Erdman, Celebrant
 

Serving Greater Daytona Beach Area, Volusia County, and Central Florida
 

Celebrate Your Love Through Vow Renewals 

by Dr. Cheri Erdman, Celebrant
Originally printed in
The Island Voice

January/February 2009

Say “February” and what do you automatically think of?  Valentine’s Day, of course! Like most people, when we see February on the calendar we begin to see red hearts and bouquets of roses. It’s hard to ignore February 14^th when those cute, chubby cupids are aiming their quiver of arrows straight for us! Seeing these signs everywhere reminds us to buy romantic cards, colorful bouquets, and boxes of chocolate.  

For those in a special relationship, Valentine’s Day brings either excitement at the thought of doing something exceptional for their loved one . . .  or dread. Why? Because we usually want to go beyond cards, candy and flowers to show how much we love our mates, but we are clueless as to what to do to make them feel really special. 

As a Celebrant who believes in the magic of rituals and ceremonies, I have a great suggestion: celebrate your love by having a vow renewal ceremony! 

A renewal of vows reflects the aging and maturing of a relationship. It is especially common at “milestone” anniversaries such as at 25 or 50 years of marriage. But a vow renewal can happen at any time and for any reason a couple thinks is important in their relationship. For instance, some couples elope and want to renew their vows in a larger, more public way. Or maybe a relationship has been through difficult times and the couple wants to rededicate themselves to the partnership. There are many reasons, including celebrating your love on the most obvious love-day of the year, February 14^th. 

There are no limits to your creative expression since a vow renewal ceremony is an emotional rather than legal act. The goal is to pledge your commitment to each other again, focusing on what you have built together through your relationship.

 Some ideas for getting started:

• Ask yourself why you are choosing to renew your promises to each other and what doing this ceremony means to you.

• Use this time as an opportunity to reflect on your relationship, your difficulties overcome, your accomplishments achieved together.

• Look at each other with fresh eyes and write down the qualities you love most in your partner.

• Think of all the people who have supported your relationship over the years and consider this an opportunity to thank them publicly.

• Look for quotes and music that reflect your feelings for each other to embellish your ceremony.

• If you are married, revisit your original vows. You may want to re-state them as originally written or choose sections you want to emphasize at this juncture in your relationship.

• Ask, “who will officiate?” Since this is not a legal act, anyone can oversee your event – a friend or a family member. However, I would encourage using a Celebrant to help you sort through your goals, thoughts, and feelings to write and officiate your unique, personalized vow renewal ceremony.

This February 14th, aim cupid’s arrow straight to you and your loved one’s heart by promising once again to cherish each other forever by renewing your promises to each other.

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