Dr. Cheri Erdman, Celebrant
 

Serving Greater Daytona Beach Area, Volusia County, and Central Florida
 

Honoring the Mother-To-Be: Birth Circles 

by Dr. Cheri Erdman, Celebrant
Originally printed in
The Island Voice

March/April2009

The Three Wise Men and their baby gifts started a tradition that lives on today as a baby shower. Important and fun as baby showers are, the celebration is really about the baby-to-be-born and not focused on the mother-to-be. Giving birth is a key life passage for women but in our “modern ways” we have focused on the physical aspect of pregnancy and lost touch with birth’s profound mental, emotional and spiritual impact.

The Navajo Indians have a tradition called “blessing way” that helps native women prepare for giving birth that includes all dimensions of her experience. Adapting their idea without co-opting their tradition, some women have begun to honor the mother-to-be in a ceremonial space named the “birth circle.”

A birth circle is different from a baby shower because its primary objective is to honor the mother-to-be and to create a circle of support that will hold her as she prepares to give birth. It is a way to create a community of women who are blessing, teaching and supporting one another.

This ceremony and its personalized rituals offer the expectant mother a space to release her fears and worries about the physical aspects of birthing and create a positive environment where she can think about the birth in a different way. Emphasis is on her strengths and helping her to tune in to her intuitive self which will guide her as she steps into the role of Mother.

It is a ceremony that is for every expectant mother because it is designed to provide a deeply meaningful experience while honoring her personal belief system, whether she has a specific religion, spiritual belief or not.

A birth circle can be serious or playful, depending on the wishes of the woman being honored. Surrounding the expectant mother with support and love, the guests at a birth circle treat the expectant mother like a queen, the center of everyone’s attention. Instead of unwrapping baby presents, the mother-to-be is surrounded by friends and relatives who may pamper her, clean her house, prepare food, read her poetry or prose, tell stories, share their birthing experiences, and give her gifts symbolic of the occasion.

Keep these things in mind if you are interested in having a birth circle:

• This need not be a complicated event. Stay in your comfort zone when thinking about the kinds of things you’d like to have happen. Then set your intention for the ceremony and its rituals.
• Create a space that feels and looks special.
• Invite women you know and love who will support you in your effort to connect to all dimensions – mental, emotional and spiritual -- of your birthing experience.
• Keep the focus on you, the expectant mother and your needs, not the yet-to-be-born baby. Have a baby shower for that purpose.
• If this feels daunting and you’d like some assistance in creating a personal ceremony with rituals, call on the services of a Celebrant.

A birth circle is an unusual, nurturing and creative way to prepare for being a Mother.

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